Why Inviting an Old Bestie to Your Big Day Is a Big Deal
According to an interview newly-engaged heiress and socialite, Paris Hilton, just had with the gossip kweens at TMZ, she ‘of course’ plans to invite old pal Kim K to her wedding. Wow, loveeees it!
Granted, her positive, off the cuff response might just be afterglow effects of her out of control engagement, but nonetheless, we can certainly still appreciate the nice gesture of goodwill. After all, with their storied past, we’d be surprised if Paris and Kim ever made a reconciliation - but maybe it’s just something about a wedding that makes a bride a little soft and gooey. That or the fact that with a $2-million-dollar pear-shaped sparkler on your finger anything is possible…
Anyway, while we don’t expect Paris to up and decide to include her former assistant and closet organizer in her bridal party - which will undoubtedly include Nicki and her princess nieces - it would still be nice to have her in attendance. Friendships endure so much over the years, from career plateaus to career explosions, someone’s star rising and someone’s falling fast, to new relationships and new friendships causing complexities and riling up the rumor mill. But at the end of the day, having someone who has known you and loved you for so long at your wedding means the world.
Paris has come a long way since that tape and The Simple Life that followed, and we’re so proud of her. She’s also given brides some serious inspiration when it comes to patching up old friendships - well, at least letting go of the past for one day, in celebration of a new year and new love.
Here are a few extra things to keep in mind, if you’re planning on inviting an old [friendship] flame to your wedding:
reach out before you send a save-The-date
If you haven’t exactly been having wine and Netflix dates with your former BFF in a while, it could be one of the most awkward things ever 1) to send out a save the date and 2) have her open it feeling shocked as s***. You might not even have her current address, especially if you had your falling out after college and both moved far away to start your professional lives. So, our advice would be to reach out well in advance of sending out your STDs, and ask to have coffee or a lunch date. That is, if you think it’s appropriate (if you ladies were flat-out hating each other by the end, then maybe not so much). Share that ‘it’s been so long since we last caught up’ and that you’re really hoping to reignite your soulmate spark.
Make sure she's also invited to the bridal shower
Now, we’re not saying that you have to get ridiculously close again (at least, so soon), but if you plan on inviting your girlfriend from your glory days to your wedding, then she should also get a memo about your bridal shower. We get it, having her at your bachelorette party, especially if you ladies made a habit out of letting your claws come out whenever alcohol was involved, might be too much. But everyone should be on their best behavior at a bridal shower #ladylikeaf, so we’re sure you’ll all manage to get along. And if she’s coming to your shower, you can do your best to get her acquainted with some of the people you think you’ll seat her with at the wedding - so that she’s not feeling totally abandoned and out of place on the big day.
give her a plus one
If you’re already taking a step towards re-exploring your friendship by extending her an invite to your wedding, then do her another solid and invite her with a date. It takes just as much courage for her to accept the invite as it does for you to do the former, so don’t take her security blanket away by inviting her solo. Perhaps you used to run in a lot of the same social circles and once you parted ways, you got the mutual friends in the deal. If she’ll need to confront the rest of your girl posse at the reception, she should at least be able to have a date to strategize the meet up with and hit the open bar with after the fact. All things considered, just do the right thing and let her bring her boo or another date who she knows will be her backup.
At the end of the day, let’s just remember that we’re all adults here. There’s no reason you two can’t wo(man) up for the day and put your past transgressions and whole lotta drama behind you.
And while we’re at it, here are some tips to ensure you don’t lose your mind if you’ll also be inviting some of your fiancé’s girl friends to the wedding.